Brotherhood of Being

Free monthly men’s circle, online

A circle for men ready to stop carrying it all alone.

Come as you are. Leave with nothing to hide.

Join the circle What happens in a circle
  • Second Wednesday, every month
  • 12:00 pm Central
  • On Zoom, always free
What we practice

Three practices. Every circle.

Brotherhood of Being is a space where men lay down the mask, speak their truth, and reclaim their strength through real connection. We guide online men’s circles and retreats for men who are ready to stop carrying it all alone.

  1. Speak the truth.

    Say the real thing out loud, in plain words, to men who can hear it without flinching.

  2. Take bold action.

    The bold move is showing up, being present, and saying what’s true. That is the practice. What you do with it outside is yours.

  3. Anchor lasting change.

    We come back every month, and the work compounds. Same men, same fire, one hour at a time.

No fixing. No posturing. Just real support from men who get it.

Who it’s for

For the one everyone leans on.

For those who feel isolated, overwhelmed, or tired of always being “the strong one”, this is your invitation to come home to yourself.

What it isn’t: therapy, a seminar, or a place to get fixed. It’s men being real and taking turns listening.

  • You’re the one people lean on, and there’s nowhere for you to lean.
  • You have plenty of people around you, and no one you tell the real stuff to.
  • Things look fine from the outside. Inside, you’re tired, numb, or angry.
  • You want men in your life who will tell you the truth and stand with you anyway.
What happens in a circle

One hour around the fire.

Every circle is built from the same handful of elements. The man guiding that month decides the order, so no two circles run quite the same way. Here is what an hour holds.

  • Arrive

    Land and check in

    Cameras on, a quiet welcome, and a round through the whole circle. How you are arriving, or a win, or a word for where you are today. Short answers are fine.

  • Agreements

    How we do this

    Four lines, every time. What’s said here stays here. Speak your truth. No fixing. Show up as you are. It takes a minute, and it is the reason the hour works.

  • Practice

    A minute to get out of your head

    A few slow breaths together, or a short body scan led out loud. Nothing strange, nothing you have to be good at. It is how men get from thinking about the topic to feeling it.

  • Teach

    A short teaching, and a real story

    One of the four of us brings this month’s theme, usually with something he is living himself. Ten minutes or so. Sometimes we ask the room what it thinks first, then teach.

  • Inward

    A few minutes on your own

    One question on the screen and a timer running. Write, or just sit with it. The point is that you walk into the next part with something to say instead of hunting for it.

  • Small groups

    Ten to fifteen minutes, three men

    The longest stretch of the hour, and the part men come back for. Small rooms of two to four. You get your turn, the other men listen, and nobody fixes anybody. If the circle is small that day we stay together instead.

  • Full group

    Back together, and what landed

    Whoever wants to says what came up. The rest of us listen. Pass is a full answer, and plenty of men listen the whole first time.

  • Anchor

    One word to carry out

    We go around once. One word, or one line, for whatever you are taking with you. Then the date of the next circle, and you head back into your day.

After the call: we send a short recap with the one thing worth carrying forward, and the date of the next circle.

First-timer questions
Next circle

Wednesday, October 14

  • 12:00 to 1:00 pm Central
  • On Zoom
  • Free

Guided by Octavio Lorenzo

Save my seat How we hold the circle

We meet the second Wednesday of every month. The Zoom link comes to your inbox after you join the list.

Coming up

  • Wed, Nov 11Guided by Mark
  • Wed, Dec 9Guided by Paul
  • Wed, Jan 13Guided by Tony
What we sit with

A year of circles, in themes.

Each month one of us brings something he is actually living. No curriculum, no homework. A sense of the ground we cover:

  • Fear, and the thing you keep avoiding because it would reveal you
  • The voice in your head, and how you talk to yourself when nobody is listening
  • The stories you tell about yourself, where they came from, and what they cost
  • Performing and proving, versus being known
  • Repair after conflict, instead of running the same fight again
  • Awareness before willpower, because you cannot change what you will not look at
  • Where your attention actually goes, and whether it is making you who you want to be
  • The part of you that got locked away to keep the peace
  • Being before doing, and turning the noise down enough to hear yourself
  • Whether the path you are on has any heart left in it
  • What you are still carrying, and the goodbyes you never finished
  • The one thing you would put down, if you replaced it instead of just quitting

Every circle stands on its own. Come to one, miss two, come back. Nothing to catch up on.

Watch

Meet the circle.

A short introduction to Brotherhood of Being. Give it a few minutes and see if it feels like your kind of room.

More on our YouTube channel (opens in a new tab).

From the circle

In their own words.

  • It was wonderful to be with the brotherhood. What became possible for me is to be with a set of empathetic witnesses… It raised a sense of accountability in myself and brought my awareness into alignment with what I want and what I’m working towards.

    M. Aurelius Higgs Watch his video from M. Aurelius Higgs (opens in a new tab)

  • Brotherhood of Being is an honest, open and safe space for me to share more of my authentic self.

    TS

  • Feeling more free to engage with my masculinity. Really nice group of guys!!!!!

    Keith Johnson
Who guides the circle

Four men walking the path themselves.

Leadership rotates. Each month one of us guides the circle, so you’ll get to know all four voices. Our circles are forged in trust, truth, and brotherhood.

How we hold the circle

Four agreements. Every time.

These keep the circle built on trust. Every man agrees to them, leaders included.

  1. What’s said here stays here.

    Share your own story anywhere you like. Other men’s stories stay in the circle.

  2. Speak from “I”.

    Talk about your own life and what’s true for you, not what “men” do or what “you” should do.

  3. No fixing.

    We listen. We don’t give advice, rescue, or debate unless a man asks for it.

  4. Pass is always allowed.

    You never have to share. “Pass” is a full answer, and no one will push.

We also ask you to

  • Keep your camera and mic on
  • Find a quiet place to sit (no driving)
  • Silence notifications and close the extra tabs
  • Use the chat for support, not links or promos
  • Stay from the opening to the close
  • Show up as yourself. That’s the whole dress code.

Confidentiality is a promise we make to each other as men, not a legal guarantee.

First time?

Questions men ask before they come.

What does it cost?

Nothing. The monthly circles are free. If we host retreats down the road, some may have a cost, and we’ll tell you plainly before you sign up for anything.

Do I have to share?

No. Pass is a full answer, and plenty of men just listen their first time. Two things to know so nothing catches you off guard: the small groups give each man a turn, and at the end we go around once for a single word. You can pass on both, and no one will push.

Do I need my camera on?

We ask for camera and mic on, because the circle works when men can see each other. Find a quiet spot where you can sit still: not driving, not multitasking. Step off camera for a minute if you need to. If keeping it on is hard for you for some reason, reach out and we’ll talk it through.

What if I don’t know what to say?

You will have a few quiet minutes with one question and a timer before anyone asks you anything. That is on purpose. Most men walk into the small group with something they did not know they had.

How many men will be there?

Usually a handful. Some circles are ten, some are four. The small ones are often the best ones, because the room gets honest faster. Either way you will get time to talk and time to be heard.

Is this a pitch for your coaching?

No. The circle is free and nothing is sold in the hour. The four of us are coaches and we’ll say so, and if you ever want to work with one of us you can find us. That’s it. We show up to these for the same reason you would.

Is what I say kept private?

What’s said in the circle stays in the circle. Every man agrees to that. It’s a promise we make to each other, not a legal guarantee, so share what you’re comfortable having heard.

Is this therapy?

No. Brotherhood of Being is peer support and facilitated conversation. Our leaders are coaches and fellow travelers, not your therapist, and this is not counseling, medical care, or crisis care. It can sit alongside therapy just fine.

If you are in crisis in the US, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, any time. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. Outside the US, contact your local emergency number.

Who is it for?

Men, 18 and older, who want real connection. You don’t need to be in crisis, and you don’t need to have it figured out. Come as you are.

What time is that where I live?

Circles start at 12:00 pm Central (US) and run one hour. That’s 1:00 pm Eastern, 11:00 am Mountain, and 10:00 am Pacific.

How do I get the Zoom link?

Join the list. We email the link before each circle, plus a short recap after.

Can I bring a friend?

Please do. Bring one man who needs this. Have him join the list so the link lands in his own inbox.

Choose your next step

Wherever you are, there’s a door.

No pressure. Pick the one that fits today.

Join the circle

Pull up a chair.

Join the list to gather around our virtual fire each month. You’ll get a reminder with the Zoom link, plus a short, soulful recap after every call so you can keep carrying the spark forward.

  • Show up monthly to sharpen courage and presence
  • Recap notes and one actionable takeaway after every circle
  • Early invites to future fireside retreats
  • Meet brothers who fuel accountability and joy

Save your seat

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Real strength starts where silence ends.